Just that week...

I have been talking a lot lately about God using people to fill the gap for me. A dear friend sent me this blog this morning, and well, this blogger sums it up quite perfectly actually!

http://angiesmithonline.com/2012/02/baros/

If you have a sec, I would suggest that you read it. It is biblical, there are some burdens that are meant to be shared, and God places special people on your journey to do just that. I am so grateful.

In regards to how I am doing? Well, thanks for asking! ha. It is once again THAT week of the month. The week where you evaluate every pain, ache, cramp, temperature drop, tint in my pee, and well...everything else! I am 99.2 % positive that I am starting my period, but until that happens, there is always this glimmer of hope...buried deep down in my heart. Hope that I am wrong. Hope that this is my month. Hope that God has opened my womb and performed a miracle. I can't fight the hope, but it is also that hope that allows for such a great disappointment!

So, with that being said, the question I have been thinking about is what's next? This is my third month on Femara, a fertility medicine, that the doctor said I could take for 3-4 months. Regan and I have started to pray for discernment and wisdom as to what that looks like. If you think about it, we would appreciate you joining us on those prayers.

The way we see it, there are pretty much two options.

1. Pursue the fertility clinic for more extensive testing. To see if there is something going on that the general test the OBGYN administered didn't pick up on. They have told me from the beginning that they think I am a good candidate for IUI. So these test would potentially lead to pursuing that option.

2. Start the adoption process.

I don't know what the answers will be to what's next. I honestly, just want a baby. I was holding a friends baby the other night and just had this overwhelming feeling of "this is what I am made for." I probably could have cried. I long for that.

So...here we are. Still patiently praying and begging for a baby, and also begging for some direction.

Much Love-
Al